Avoidance
by Roxie156
Summary: As Hermione struggles to adapt to the changes in her life, she finds understanding from someone she never thought she would.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi, just want to say thankyou for looking at my story; It's my first fic so I would really appreciate some reviews as feed back.**

**Also, I would like to thank my wonderful Beta AlexisRose for taking a chance on a new writer and tidying this up for me!**

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Flipping her somewhat-less-unruly-than-it-used-to-be hair out of her face, Hermione sighed as she shelved her books and idly selected new passages to pass the time. It had been another long night of avoidance since her return to Hogwarts for her final "eighth" year.

Avoidance. That was all she felt she could do since the events that lead to the culmination of the Second War. Avoiding her parents, who were still blissfully unaware that there was no such thing as an 'Advanced Eighth Year Program" at Hogwarts, avoiding her friends who didn't know and could never understand the things she had seen and done to ensure that the Light side triumphed. Avoiding the Weasleys: her second family who still saw her as the little Muggle-born whom they only wanted to be theirs and finally- most importantly- avoiding Ron and Harry.

Though they were and always would be her best friends, she could no longer stand to be around them. The Unforgivables that she had had to cast during their struggle to survive bore down on her every hour of every day. She didn't _really_ blame them. They just weren't as strong as she was. Their strength was in stunners and minor hexes that just didn't cut it on the battlefield. She also knew that whilst they still loved her as she loved them, they didn't look at her with the same unconditional sentiment in their eyes. There was a sheen there that showed hesitance and a hint of suspicion that maybe, just maybe, the Dark Arts had responded a little too strongly to Hermione's call.

So here she was again. Avoiding.

Being a well known bibliophile, Hermione had finally gotten into Madam Pince's good graces, and as such was given an unlimited to pass to her favourite place: the Hogwarts Library. Along with the other fifteen students to opt to return to their education, Hermione had been given her own separate quarters in a wing of the rebuilt castle. These two factors were the only things allowing her to survive.

She slept in her room. She ate in her room. She studied in her library. Her weekly curriculum update meetings were held in Headmistress McGonagall's office and conveniently scheduled to avoid any contact with other students. Well, all bar one; Draco 'Prince of Slytherin' Malfoy.

Malfoy was the one person her avoidance seemed to miss out. She knew he had switched to the side of Light early on, before even his failed attempt at the assassination of Professor Dumbledore, but he was still troubled by the 'looks'. The looks from the same people who bestowed them on her; that reluctance to maintain eye contact and the propensity to stare a little too long when they thought she…_they_ weren't aware.

And it was these looks that allowed the proud lioness to regularly consort with the snake, although she didn't really see him that way or _consort_ with him for that matter. They merely tolerated each other's presence in silence- in avoidance. Never acknowledging what linked them but never forgetting it either.

"Granger…"

She didn't want to go back to her room. It was cold, and she wasn't tired.

"Granger!..."

She could stay here, in her nook, get some more books, there were never enough after all.

"Hermione!!"

It was Malfoy. Talking to her. Explicitly _not_ avoiding her!

"Malfoy?" she asked quizzically, small lines forming between her brows as if she didn't quite believe someone was talking to her.

"Of course it's me Granger, we're the only two here, we're the only two _ever_ here!"

"What can I do for you Draco? I was just about to head off to the wing…"

"No."

"No...?" Again with the lines marred her brow, denoting a problem she couldn't quite grasp. "What do you mean 'no', Malfoy? If you're not going to make sense, why don't you go away and stop bothering me."

"What I meant _Hermione,_" Draco started patiently, "is that no, you weren't about to leave. Do you even realise the time? It's nearly midnight and you've been sitting here- in _your_ nook- for over an hour staring at what appears to be a tome on the mating nuances of the South Asian Hippogriffs."

It was nearly midnight? What was it to him anyway? She thought they had an unspoken agreement, that their acquaintance was just that – unspoken, and therefore conducive to the avoidance program that they were both so avidly following.

"For your information, _Malfoy._" Ha. Two can play the name change game ferret! "I'm reading this for the Care of Magical Creatures N.E.W.T project paper I'm preparing. Now, is there anything else, or can you please leave me to my studies?!"

"It's upside down."

"What?" she exclaimed, the lines returning to her forehead as she struggled to understand him. Why was he standing there looking at her? Arms folded, nonchalantly leaning against one of the three bookcases that protected her from everyone else, or so she thought…

"For Merlin's sake Granger, the book- the 'oh-so-important' book that you are so avidly reading for your precious paper- is upside down. And in French." He was teasing her! The ferr… Draco Malfoy was teasing _her_ and smiling?

"Hermione, look. I know you're feeling isolated, _believe me, _I know about isolation_._ I watch you, you know. You go from your quarters to the nook and back, do you even eat? You're so thin and pale you could be my sister if it weren't for that hair…" he trailed off for a moment, looking at her with a look she couldn't quite decipher; pain certainly, but something else too…Oh! He's talking again.

"Did you know some of the first-years think that you're a ghost? They're too scared to come back here for class books because they think the Ghost of Granger's Nook will get them!" His voice was soft but there was an undercurrent _something_ that gave it power.

Was it concern or contempt? No, not concern, not from him, not from _anyone_. Contempt then. It was just an excuse to berate and denigrate her about her flaws. Again. Nothing had changed; she was even more worthless in his eyes now. The high and mighty Gryffindor Muggle-born seduced by the dark side. _That_ was what he thought. It was what they all thought.

Hermione tried to avoid the dreaded eye contact as she gathered her scrolls and quills and endeavoured to put them in her bag quickly but unhurriedly, so that he didn't know that he had won.

"Don't run from me Granger. I…"

"You WHAT Malfoy?! You want to drag me down some more? My looks not offering you enough ammunition, want to start on my intelligence and blood inferiority again too?" Fuck it, she hadn't meant to bite but he made her blood boil and her temper snap every damn time.

He grabbed at her arm and firmly swung her around to face him, reaching up with his other hand to secure his grasp on her.

"Let go of me Malfoy, or else I'll…"

"You'll what, Hermione? Your wand is under the table. I don't want to hurt you. I…I'm trying to, to…Merlin's Balls Hermione, will you please stop wriggling!"

At that he yanked her forward using his superior strength and spinning her, held firmly yet gently against his body, her back to his chest with his arms crossed across her stomach. She honestly did not know what the hell was happening. For the first time in a long time Hermione Granger, Brains of the Golden Trio, Brightest Witch of the Age, didn't know what to do, so she said the first thing that came to mind.

"Why do you keep calling me Hermione?" It was a timid, hollow echo of her true voice that sounded sad and wrong to her ears, and unknowingly to her, Draco's as well.

When he spoke, his voice was so soft and close in her ear that she startled in his grip.

"I was under the impression that it was your name, granted an annoyingly long one, but unique and yours nonetheless."

"You call me Granger or Mudblood, you always have. Why change? Is this some sort of ploy?" It was closer to normal now- her voice, that is- nothing else in this picture was remotely normal. She was being held, in the library by Draco Sodding Malfoy for God's sake.

"Hermione, with everything we've gone through in the past seven years, don't you think we can get past that and call each other by our given names? I just want to talk, civilly. So, can I let you go?"

Could he? Did she really want him to? This was the most human contact she'd had in months, even if it was _him_.

"Yes Mal... Draco, you can let me go." As he released her, she stepped away, wrapping her arms around herself to try and maintain the feeling of comfort she'd had only seconds ago in his arms. And wasn't _that_ an oxymoron if ever there was one; she'd actually found a feeling of security in the embrace of her arch-nemesis.

"Look, Draco, I appreciate your…concern? But I'm fine, really, Winky brings food to my dorm room and I study here. I'm already done with my N.E.W.T work to be honest, I'm just going for extra credit preparation until I know what I want to pursue. _I'm_ fine." All of this was said with her back to him as she tried in vain to find her wand.

"Okay." She turned and looked at him with hope. He believed her. They would go back to the avoidance and she could carry on as she was. With a large smile plastered to her face, she turned to him, wand raised in triumph.

"Great! Okay! Well…"

"Okay. Now say it again, but look me in the eye this time, Hermione."

She stilled, not quite knowing what to do. "Draco, I was looking for my wand, which as _you_ pointed out, was under the table. I couldn't very well look for it and look you in the eye at the same time now could I?"

"Good point."

"Okay so I'll…"

"But if you meant it, then you wont have any trouble saying it again while looking me in the eye, will you?"

Damn him, why was he doing this to her? Why did he choose today to break the silence?

"For fuck's sake! I meant what I said Draco, the only reason for me to repeat myself is for your own childish enjoyment at detaining me longer than you already have. Now, if you'll step aside, can I go?!"

"No." Why did she have to choose the nook surrounded on three sides? It was a great idea. But now- now _he_ was standing directly in the middle of the only exit.

"Just move!"

"No. You _asked_ if you could leave, and my answer is no. Hermione, please, I just want an honest conversation. I'll even start if you'd like. Shall we sit?"

She couldn't overpower him if he wanted to keep her there, and this was the most social interaction she'd had in longer than she could remember. So, she sat.

With a wave of her hand, she bade him to continue, watching him sit in front of her and tense, holding his head in his hands as he commenced his tale.

"You know most of what happened to me I'm sure. It started when my father forced me to take the Dark Mark and progressed through regular beatings, to torture, to the Imperious. My..." He paused, laying his hands flat on the table in front of her and looking up directly at her. The old saying rang screaming through her head because she could practically see every beating and emotional hurt through the grey slate windows of his eyes. Impulsively, she leaned forward and clutched his hands in her own, gently stroking his knuckles with her thumbs to encourage him to continue.

Drawing a shaky breath, he started to speak, choosing to re-focus his gaze on their joined hands.

"My mother was the one to free me, she convinced my fath... Lucius-" Another slight pause, where his grip tightened around her fingers as if for strength.

"She convinced Lucius that she could secure my loyalty with the Death Eaters so that he would lift the Imperius. Of course, as soon as I had the opportunity, I ran. I ran to the Order and for my cowardice, my mother was punished." His voice had gotten shakier as he talked. On the last word, it cracked as tears slipped down his face. Opening her mouth to speak, Draco stopped her with a squeeze to her wrist.

"I need to finish. I need for you to understand why you're not alone, Hermione. I have been ostracised by friends and family in the same way you have been for opposite but identical reasons. I embraced the wrong side of magic. For you, it was the Dark curses you had to use to ensure the survival of your friends and yourself and the victory of the side of the Light in the War against Voldemort. For me, it was embracing the feelings of compassion and empathy that are so reviled among my peers and revered amongst your own."

He was looking at her directly again now, his voice having grown stronger throughout the last part of his speech.

"Hermione, our journeys weren't identical but our destination is the same. We are alone together. I see the same loneliness in your eyes that I see in my own. I watch the way you avoid your friends and the professors unless you absolutely cannot escape, and I mirror you. And Hermione, I can't do it anymore. I need someone who understands the way I feel without the judgement and I think you do too."

She didn't know what to say. Her thoughts were jumbled yet simultaneously clear. He was right. She needed someone to share her pain but couldn't believe that he was the one to do that with. She saw the reality of her existence in the pain and shadow of hope in his eyes, and knew what she should do.

She released his hands but maintained eye contact as she glimpsed the rejection there, which he thought was all she offered. Moving around the table, she sat next to him and reached for him once again. She needed the strength the contact offered if she was going to do this as he had.

When he turned to face her- his hand closing around her own- she opened her mouth and began her story, despite knowing it might ruin the tentative friendship that had begun to take form.

"As you know, Harry, Ron and I were charged with a specific task by Professor Dumbledore. He asked that we find and destroy the Horcruxes created by Voldemort to ensure his own survival. During our trip, Harry, trying to bolster our spirits and prove that there was nothing to fear, said Voldemort's name aloud. The curse cast by Riddle allowed several of his most loyal Death Eaters to immediately Apparate to our location"

As his point, she paused as he had, drawing courage from she knew not where to continue.

"Your father was there, Draco. And the boys… They were so scared and panicked, I had to take charge, Ron was hit with a slicing hex and couldn't fight and Harry was so distraught at having brought them upon us, he was sloppy. I saw our defeat right then. I saw them lying dead in front of me, and our world under _his_ control, and I couldn't let it happen, Draco. You have to understand, I did what I thought was best. I used the Killing Curse. I killed three before they ran. Full-grown wizards and witches ran from _me_. I checked the boys and then we each took a body to ensure we were safe and to…dispose of evidence."

She looked down at her lap, pushing through to the completion of her tale.

"Draco, the one _I_ had responsibility for removing- my third victim- it… It was your father, Draco. I killed Lucius Malfoy." She had to stop. She could feel the tenseness in his body through the link of their hands and thought that finally, her pain would end because he would end it. Now that he knew the truth of what she had done 'on her journey', as he had put it, she was certain he would take the appropriate retribution. And so she waited.

When he hadn't moved in a few minutes, she looked up to his face and saw not revenge, but acceptance there. He leaned forward, raising his hand, and shocked, she retreated in her chair. It was not a strike that landed however but an embrace. He pulled her to him, cradling her head in his hands and whispered in her ear.

"Thank you."

That was _not_ what she had expected. She tried to pull away but he held her to him as he continued to speak.

"The man you killed. The _Death Eater_ you removed from our society was not my father, Hermione. The man who taught me to ride a broom and the basics of how to apply Arithmancy to business transactions was lost to me years ago. The _thing_ you destroyed was my torturer and you were brave enough to do what I could not. When I had the opportunity, I ran from him to save myself. You sacrificed your morals, which for you, I believe, is greater than sacrificing your life. And you did that for people you love, Hermione. Even though I am not one of them and even though you did it without knowing what he had done to me, you did it for me as well, and I can never repay you for that. I can only try to be here for you. To show you that your motives and efforts were emphatically not wrong!"

She could feel the wetness of her own tears dripping from her chin and raised her hands to surround him as his did her. When she felt him start to retreat, she instantly released him, assuming that he was finished with her now, but found his hands were still holding hers. Slowly, he slid a hand up her arm and gently cupped her chin, raising her face to his own. Hesitantly, he lowered his lips towards her, pausing for but a moment to gaze searchingly into her eyes. It seemed he found what he was looking for, as the next instant his lips were on hers.

Once the shock had abated, she slid her eyes closed and increased the pressure of her lips to his, amazed at the surge of feelings coursing through her. Whilst she had always thought him attractive on a peripheral level, she had never thought of Draco in a romantic setting- until now. She knew that part of the rush was simply having basic human contact after such a long absence, but that didn't stop her from parting her lips to stroke her tongue against his, to further and prolong the experience.

Once again, she felt him pulling away and though she tried to follow, he gently restricted her movement. Somehow, she had ended up on the study table with Draco nestled in the apex of her thighs. They were both breathing heavily and she could tell it had been as difficult for him to stop as it was for her.

"You didn't finish your story."

His statement momentarily confused her until she realised that she had, in fact, stopped her story at the start of the events that lead to her separation and avoidance of her closest friends.

"You need to finish it, Hermione. You know what happened to me after I ran. I joined the Order and told them everything I knew, I helped to aid the wounded brought to me, one of them being you, if you recall. But I was not there at the final battle, I was at the safe house, and then I came here. I don't know how your journey got you here and I _need_ to know and you _need_ to tell me."

She didn't have to think it over. She had already told him the worst thing she had done and he hadn't batted an eye.

"Draco, I'm happy to do this, but can we go to the Eighth-Year Common Room? I'm exhausted and there shouldn't be anyone there at this time of night." She stood and took his hand again to pull him along behind her.


	2. Chapter 2

**A little bit shorter this time but hopefully still ok, Please let me know what you think, I'm not above begging people!**

**Once again, big thanks to my Beta AlexisRose.**

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She released his hand as they entered their wing, moving to settle on one of the three low, worn sofas in front of the glowing embers of the dying fire. Worrying her lower lip with her teeth, she turned to Draco as he sat beside her.

Deciding that there was no point in delaying any further, she continued her tale.

"After I did what I did, we returned to the safe house so as to tend to our injuries. As you said yourself, I was treated by you. I couldn't look you in the face knowing that I had just murdered your father so as soon as you were done, I left. I waited for the boys so that we could complete our task and we did it, Draco, we destroyed all bar one of that Bastard's damn Horcruxes."

He had moved closer when she mentioned his father, placing an arm around her shoulders to lend support to her. She pushed forward with her story, and when she paused again, he gently squeezed her shoulder, offering her strength to persevere.

"When we couldn't figure out what object contained the final soul piece, we returned to the Order and prepared for the final battle. I'm sure you know the general version of what occurred. Voldemort was tricked into believing Harry was dead. Neville killed the snake, Nagini, who turned out to be the final Horcrux, and he was defeated. We…_I_ thought everything would return to normal; that we would carry on as the Gryffindor trio. I would complete my studies with the best N.E.W.T. scores in decades and we would move on, but that's not what happened."

She was openly crying now, for her losses: her friends, her family and her future. Draco pulled her onto his lap, murmuring comforting words and sounds while stroking her hair as she finally cracked the seal on her emotions and let them flow.

"Hermione, I know it's hard, but you've got to finish. If you want to move past this and get on with your life, you have to tell me everything that bought you to this point. Please Hermione, do it for yourself."

He shifted so that he reclined on the couch with her tucked in the nook of his shoulder, her head on his chest. Using the steady thrum of his heartbeat to centre herself, she pushed on with the tale of her journey.

"As soon as victory was assured, they left me. They couldn't even bring themselves to look at me or say goodbye, Draco, they just…they just walked away and left me there in the Great Hall. I went back to headquarters to clean myself up and regroup with everyone, but it was evident that they didn't want me there. No one would look at me, and those that actually spoke to me kept it to 'Congratulations' or asking about the boys. No one mentioned what I had done, what I sacrificed to bring about the end. I know I sound self-righteous, but I can honestly say that without me, the War would have been lost. Those two would never have made it out of the woods that first night, the Death Eaters would have finished them and we would be living under his rule at this very moment."

She realised that her volume had been increasing along with her indignation as her anger fuelled her speech, so she took a moment to calm herself, taking deep breaths and using Draco's heartbeat once again as a guide to slow her own racing pulse.

"I went home to my parents. I didn't do any magic for two months, convinced them that I'd graduated and they took my word at face value. Who wouldn't? I'm Hermione Granger, I never broke the rules that they knew of and the fact that over the last few years, the excuses of extra study and invitations from the Weasleys had cemented my cover story of staying away from them. I told them that things weren't done the same in the wizarding world. There wouldn't be a ceremony and there was no such thing as University, I had to wait for imaginary 'offers' of jobs or apprenticeships that I knew would never come. I had it all mapped out in my head. I would convince them that Muggle-borns weren't liked or respected enough to gather good positions."

She stopped there, glancing up at him from the pillow of his chest to give him a wry smile. "Guess who gave me that bright idea, Draco?" His only answer was the patented Malfoy smirk, so she continued.

"So, I decided I'd get a normal Muggle job, which would keep my parents happy while we waited for the non-existent offers and keep me busy enough to not think about what I had done. I would stay in the Muggle world and not have to use magic. No one knew what I'd done, so I could pretend it had never happened. Only my plan didn't turn out as I expected it to. I got the owl from Professor McGonagall offering me a place here to complete my studies. I managed to keep them from directly seeing the letter, but as it was only the second owl I had received since my return, they were eager to find out what it had contained. I kept them guessing for a week, using the time to decide whether I could really give up such a big part of my life. In the end, I decided that magic was so integral to me that I couldn't turn my back on it, so I made up a story about an Advanced Eighth Year Program that only top students were eligible for. Made them think it was jumping off point for top apprenticeships in our world. I even gave myself an 'out'; I told them that it was so intensive I would not be able to return home for the holidays. That way, I could pursue my studies here, or if I decided I couldn't face these walls again, I could run. I could avoid anything or anyone, _everything_ and _everyone._

"So there you go. That's my story Draco, that's how I got to be here."

She settled her head more comfortably on his chest and wrapped an arm around his waist, amazed at how comfortable and light she felt.

"You're not finished yet, Hermione," he said it softly, as if speaking to a cornered animal. He wasn't afraid she would bite, but knew that a more aggressive approach would scare her.

"I don't understand? I told you how I came to be back at Hogwarts, if you want a day to day rundown, I assure you it won't be that interesting." She laughed gently and went to move herself from the cushions, but he pulled her back to the curve of his body and spoke again.

"You've told me how you came to be here, but not _all_ of the reasons. You said you only had one other owl when you were with your parents. Am I right to assume it was from Potter or Weasley? Whatever they said to you must have pulled a lot of the weight behind your decisions. They were part of you for seven years, Hermione, you can't tell me in all honesty that they no longer influence your life?"

His sceptical expression told her that she would not be getting out of this the easy way. She had thought that she'd gotten away with the almost complete telling of her months back in the Muggle world. They were all full truths, but a lie of omission was still a lie.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for reading this far, things get a little steamy at the end of this chapter but given the ratings on , I've not posted the full scene here. I will hopefully be posting it at Granger Enchanted . com at somep point though and it will be the full version.**

**I want to thank my 2 reviewers and everyone who has read this story, hopefully some more of you will let me know what you think.**

**As always, big thanks to AlexisRose for her excellent beta skills.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing, I just play with the characters of Jo's c****reation**

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She finally realised that although she knew Draco was intelligent, she'd never noticed just how smart he was. He knew she needed tell someone, but that without the gentle but forceful persuasion he was offering, she wouldn't volunteer her story. She looked up at him with a small smile.

"I was kinda hoping you hadn't or _wouldn't_ notice that, but don't I get all the luck? Seems like you're not just a pretty face after all…"

Realising what she had just said, she quickly averted her face to hide the flaming blush on her cheeks from his raised eyebrow and knowing smirk. Mortified, she rushed to recommence her tale when she felt him draw breath, to stall the cocky comments he was surely preparing to voice.

"So, the other owl- as you correctly surmised- was from Harry _and_ Ron. Harry went straight to the Weasleys after the battle. They very nearly lost both Fred and George. Fred is blind in one eye and George lost an ear, but you know them, the only thing they could lose that would hold them back would be each other."

"'Mione, you're getting off track, I don't care about the duplicate redheads, I care about you."

It appeared it was his turn for the brain/voice filter failure. Although the shortening of her name would certainly be a conversation for later, the 'feelings' talk she could do without, so she took pity on him and moved on.

"The boys had told the family, and pretty much anyone else who would listen about the incident in the woods before the final battle. At first I genuinely think they were proud of my saving them, but the more people they talked to, the more they pulled away. The number of times they stressed the words _Unforgivable Curses_ in 'casual' conversation became tiring to say the least. It didn't seem to stop them looking to me to save them in almost every scuffle we got into, though. In all honesty Draco, it royally pissed me off. They either ignored me or wouldn't look me in the eye whilst we were at headquarters or the safe houses, and then as soon as we had to go out on a mission it was all, _'Hermione should come with us, she's so clever!'_ Which really meant, _'Hermione should come with us, she's partly evil already, so she can do the hard work and we can keep an eye on her and not have to worry about losing part of our souls by casting dark curses'."_

She realised that her voice had been getting louder and unlike in the library, there were people close by who could hear and she _really_ couldn't face that.

She took a few minutes to settle her emotions, fully embracing Draco and taking the comfort he was offering. His hands had moved to calm her; one cradling her head and gently massaging her scalp, and the other resting on top of her own hand on his chest, his thumb softly sweeping across her knuckles.

"So, as you can tell, our relationship was strained before the Final Battle, and despite the fact that I _know_ they both cast the Cruciatus and Avada curses during the battle, it was only my actions that were reprimanded by the _adults_. I mean for God's sake, I'm nearly nineteen, and with everything we've gone through, I'm more adult than most. But no, the double standards come into play again; send Hermione out to face Death Eaters, but then tell her off if she has the audacity to defend herself and her friends.

"Sorry, I'm getting off track again but it just makes me so mad! The Owl. The owl was from Harry, really. It was his deplorable quill-work with Ron's signature as not much more than a post script. He said that they still loved me but that they thought I needed to think about my actions in the war. That if I need help I could go to The Burrow and they would help me relearn my way to the Light! It sounded like some kind of religious intervention for pity's sake. They said that if I chose to pursue the Dark Arts, they would have not choice but to hand me in for my own good. They were going straight into Auror training and couldn't afford to be associated with someone like that. Like _me_."

The tears had started again now. She could feel Draco's shirt was soaked through, and it clung to both his body and her face.

"Oh! Draco, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to ruin your shirt." He stilled her attempts to rise from her position.

"Hermione, it's just salt water on a shirt, it's nothing that can't be washed out. Stop stalling. I'm here to listen and if necessary, to be cried on. If it helps you, you can drown me."

She had to laugh then. She didn't think drowning the only person she'd talked to recently would really help her conscience any, but _God_ did it feel good to actually laugh!

"Shall we continue? Or would you like me to remove my shirt to ease your mind?"

"Draco! No! I'll continue. So, I replied to the owl to _thank_ them for their concern but politely declined their _gracious_ offer of assistance. I told them that I was taking time out with my parents but they were welcome to visit when they had a break from their training. That was the last I heard from them until after the letter from Professor McGonagall. I went to Diagon Alley to stock up on school supplies and saw Harry and the whole Weasley family there. It was a shock. Since I hadn't heard from them, they had slipped to the periphery of my mind. I hadn't even acknowledged that Ginny would be back at Hogwarts for her Seventh year and of course, she needed her supplies. I plucked up the courage to go over to them. I really don't know what I expected, but it was as if I walked over to them wearing a Death Eater skull mask. Ginny actually physically recoiled when I approached them."

She paused there, taking some time to cope with the flash of images that assaulted her from that meeting. It was as if she had fallen in to a Pensieve of that day and it was all she could do to continue.

"She hid herself behind Harry, and Molly pulled her away before I got there. I spoke to Harry- tried to tell him how I was going back to Hogwarts to get my N.E.W.T.'s- but I could tell he wasn't really listening. It was all I could do to stand there when he actually looked me in the eye. The look in his eyes made me want to run far, far away. It was fear. He was actually afraid of me! I didn't know what to do so I made my excuses and left them all standing in the middle of the street. I daren't look back so when someone grabbed at my arm, I almost fell. It was Ron. Bill was there with him, and the twins- they were holding him back, Draco. He wanted to hurt me, but when he realised they wouldn't allow physical pain, he settled on emotional. He told me that as far as he was concerned, there was no excuse for 'the path I had chosen'. He warned me away from Ginny- told me that if I bothered her with my 'dark ways' he would not hesitate to use his authority with the Aurors to get me sent to Azkaban.

"To say I was shocked is a slight understatement. I've always known Ron was hard headed- that once he forms an opinion he doesn't change his mind- but I never thought that would apply to me! The vitriol in his voice was like acid; it burned straight though to my heart and broke it. I know it sounds melodramatic, but at that point it was how I felt. He left then. Didn't look back at all, and once the twins realised he wasn't coming back they just gave me nod and left. I don't know whether their nod was support for me or Ron, but I suspect the latter will always come first in that family regardless of the injustice. Bill was different; he actually spoke to me. Told me that he understood why I did what I did but I had to understand that with Molly at the head of the family, any link to the Dark Arts would not be tolerated. I suspect that since Fenrir's attack Bill was walking a fine line in that family, only the fact that he is their own blood is saving him from being ostracised. He left as well, obviously. He couldn't be seen to be supporting me and I understand that, but that meeting was what really started the avoidance of everyone."

Draco pulled her up to settle her head in the crook of his neck, and kissed her temple.

"Just a little more Hermione, I know it's hard and you're exhausted but it's just a little more and then we can move on…together."

She closed her eyes and breathed him in. He was right of course, she was nearly done.

"When I got here, I can only assume that the extra week the rest of the students had had was more than enough time for Ginny to spread her version of my new 'past-time'. I swear Draco, every single one of them looks at me like I'm going to murder them in their sleep."

She moved so that she could look him in the eye.

"I want to apologise to you, Draco, I think that what they do to me now, is what my friends and I did to you for six years. We berated you and made sly comments based on our perceptions, not based on fact. Don't get me wrong, you are far from perfect, however differently you may feel about that." She smiled there to show the comment was meant in jest. "And you weren't exactly all about niceties yourself during that time but our- _my_ behaviour was unjustified in a lot of the cases."

He looked directly at her, his eyes holding a suspicious sheen.

"It means a lot to hear that Hermione; to know that someone sees beyond what my family's reputation has tarred me with. I agree that a lot of my behaviour was deplorable, the names I called you in particular. There is no excuse for that, but for you to ask for _my_ forgiveness? I don't know whether I deserve that from you but I accept it and can only offer my own apologies for my behaviour, although your comment about perfection is wholly untrue. Have you seen this bone structure?!"

She laughed at the smarmy look on his face and gently slapped his chest. The reprieve was appreciated but she still had to finish what she started.

"I decided that the best course of action was just to stick to myself, do my work and get on with my life. I spoke to Professor McGonagall and explained the situation. She agreed that I could arrange my progress meetings later at night to avoid the other students, but that only Friday would be acceptable. Imagine my…lets say _surprise_ when I saw you leaving her office that second week. If I didn't know any better, I'd say all those years with Dumbledore had rubbed off on her, and that she'd deliberately scheduled us to have adjacent progress meetings to lead to this. It's definitely something that mad old coot would do. The avoidance technique has been working for me but I do miss the companionship of the boys. I don't see them ever turning their thoughts around. Maybe Harry would if he weren't with Ginny, but I think it's too much to hope for and it would appear that they- or Ginny, or both- have spread their feelings to the other eighth-years. None of them speak to me and I don't think I could face another scene like the one at Diagon Alley if I tried to approach them. So that's it. I mean it this time. It's the whole truth of my journey. What's the verdict Judge? Can I join the club?"

She said it with a smile, but there was a hint of desperation. If this turned out to be some kind of elaborate ploy to get her to spill her guts and then spread it around the school, she was gone. She would forego her education- though it would pain her to do so- and she would retreat to the Muggle world and hide.

"Hermione look at me."

Draco's voice was soft, so she lifted her head to look at him. He didn't speak any further, his eyes were saying enough. They were shining again, but this time it was clear that acceptance, affection and empathy caused the moisture. He reached up and cupped her face and slowly lowered his face to hers.

Pausing only millimetres from her lips he whispered, "You were a shoe in from that first week, Hermione. I'm going to kiss you now, just thought you should know."

When he finished his descent, she was more prepared than she had been in the library and immediately revelled in the feelings he poured into the kiss. She moved her leg to half lie on him and began to explore his upper body with her hands. As she ghosted her hand along his ribs he gasped, which give her the opportunity to slide her tongue between his lips and fully taste him. As he sighed a moan in to her mouth, she could feel his hands start their own exploration. His arousal where her thigh rested between his legs fuelled her desires, causing her to move against him, desperate for more contact.

He slid his hands to her shoulders but surprised her when he pushed her up to break the kiss.

"Hermione, I really, _really_ want to continue this but I need to be sure that you want it and it's not just your emotions running high from tonight. Plus, I really don't think it's going to do either of our reputations any good to be caught doing this here. Would you…Would you come to my room with me?"

She searched his eyes, reading the sincerity they showed, and stood, taking his hand and leading the way to his dorm.

As they entered the room, she took a moment to get acquainted with the differences to her own, small though they were. It was mostly colour scheme; he had the same standard double bed, work table and wardrobe as she had but the soft furnishings were all shades of blue and silver. She let out a small giggle as she moved to sit on the edge of his bed to stroke the quilted royal blue comforter that lay strewn across the surface.

"Find something funny, Granger?" He moved to sit beside her and leaned back, moving his arms to rest behind him.

"The colour scheme. It's not that I expected emerald green but not blue. I just… I don't really know Draco, I just found it funny. You want to know the best part?"

"Amaze me."

"My room _is_ decorated in green; it's my favourite colour. Had to stay away from it for seven years because of you and now, when I don't give a shit about house prejudice and how it looks, you go and decorate in _blue!_"

Her voice had gotten shaky and she couldn't hold in the laughter, or the tears. She felt Draco shift on the bed and pull her up to lie with him. He was stroking her hair and cradling her against his chest as she let all of her pent up emotions flow out. After what felt like hours- but which she knew must only have been fifteen minutes at most- she turned to face him. Reaching up she stroked his face and gently wiped at the moisture that lay in _his_ cheeks.

"I'm sorry Draco, I didn't mean for things to go that way when I dragged you back here. I guess the talking kind of broke the dam, huh?"

He wiped her tears from her face with his thumbs, as she had his, and leaned down to brush feather-light kisses on each of her eyes, the bridge of her nose and finally her lips.

"I wasn't expecting anything from you Hermione…I've forced a lot on you in the last few hours and I'm certain you're exhausted. I asked you to come in here for companionship, nothing more. I just want to hold you."

While he spoke, he had been gently caressing her arms and back as he held her within his embrace. She had closed her eyes when he kissed her, but chose now to open them and look up into his. She saw his honesty underlining the truth she had heard in his whispered speech. That look- the raw emotion in his eyes- gave her the incentive and courage to sit up on the bed and slowly reach down to draw her thin jumper over her head. When she saw the astonishment in his eyes, she felt a smirk spread on her lips as she leaned down to whisper in his ear.

"I told you green was my favourite colour…"

* * *

**There may be a bit of a break between updates on this from this point as I have to go away on a course for work but hopefully, you'll come back and read when I do!**


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